


oh, how i wish that was me

by sunshineandraindrops



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: M/M, am i going to hell for writing this, crackfic™
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2017-05-21
Packaged: 2018-11-03 05:32:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10960728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshineandraindrops/pseuds/sunshineandraindrops
Summary: Yuzuru doesn't know what he was expecting.  Whatever it was, it wasn't this.





	oh, how i wish that was me

**Author's Note:**

> title from a one direction song because i am that cool  
> this is set at WTT hahaha

Yuzuru Hanyu was alone.

Yuzuru Hanyu also didn't like the fact he was alone.

He supposed he should sit with Evgenia, Mai and Wakaba and talk to them, but he is just so goddamn tired. And as much as he loves the girls and is thankful for the latter two for saving his ass with their free skates, he really cannot be asked to sit through their nigh-on obnoxious giggling that only recedes when Evgenia's struggling to say something in Japanese.

Javi left earlier, called away to go and model for TV Asahi in the Go-chan costume. Yes, after all the rumours of Yuzuru's participation, Go-chan was actually Javi, simply mirroring the way Yuzuru sets up for the quad loop, among others. Yuzuru chuckles as he remembers Javi's _emotional_ free skate, complete with an attempted quad loop that turned out being a quint and a hydroblade with such a deep edge it could make even Patrick Chan jealous.

So Yuzuru sat with Shoma, watching the way the shadows from the fading evening light reflected on his face. Shoma's angelic at the worst of times, but when he's like that, he's stunning. Yuzuru doesn't know how he's managed to resist something that irresistible for so long.

Here's Yuzuru's dilemma. Yuzuru isn't oblivious, of course he's noticed Javi creeping into his affections ever since he moved to Toronto to train. He doesn't blame Javi, it's just the way the Spanish skater puts him in a relaxed mood from the moment they see each other on those glacial early mornings at the Cricket Club. Of course he was going to develop feelings, because that's the way those cliche Hollywood movies work, right?

Shoma, however, was less expected.

Ever since Yuzuru met him, he's changed a lot. He's kept evolving, his personality growing up and maturing what seemed like every day. He's no longer the timid, indistinct boy Yuzuru met at Junior Nationals more years ago than he cares to remember. Nowadays, or at least when Yuzuru is by his side, he is unabashedly confident, cracking ludicrous jokes and smiling whenever Yuzuru says anything. Now that he thinks about it, Yuzuru can see why it happened; but he knows the Japanese media would have several field days if he ever dared make anything of it.

But after a while, Shoma mumbled some excuse about being tired and excused himself from the table, dragging himself out of the dining hall and leaving Yuzuru to where he is now, alone, with a bowl of stone cold, unfinished miso soup.

So, Yuzuru is in love with two people that he _should_ consider his two best friends, and the two said people have ditched him for modelling and sleep, respectively.

He doesn't even realise his head is dropping slowly towards the table until he feels someone tap his back cautiously. He reaches into his pocket for a pen he knows he doesn't have, but when he whips around, he sees Kana standing there, a blush tinting her cheeks.

"You wouldn't want an autograph, would you?" Yuzuru laughs at his own joke to paper over the awkwardness created by Kana's confusion, which, as a result, just makes her evidently more baffled. She shakes her head at him, murmuring something about him being delirious, before asking, like the concerned team captain she is,

"Are you alright? You look absolutely whacked."

"I'm fine," Yuzuru answers monotonously, "just a little stressed from the guilt of messing up the short." 

"Hey, we still won!" Kana exclaims, "and anyway, this competition is basically us having a laugh with our friends and skating a little. Still, better here than at worlds."

That's true. No matter what, Yuzuru is still world champion. Not even Shoma, only 2.28 points behind, could take that away from him.

Yuzuru can't even find the strength to reply, instead, he closes his eyes and visions of Javi, wobbling around on the ice, a ridiculous mascot costume draped over him, comes back to him. He knows he must be going insane when he snorts suddenly, then explodes into laughter when he sees Kana's shocked face.

"Yuzu-kun, what _is_ wrong with you?" She sighs, "you should probably go back to your room. You're sharing with Javi, right?"

"Yeah, he's doing some weird ass shit with TV Asahi right now." Yuzuru replies. God, he's fucking drained.

"Then you won't wake him up." Kana states, before flicking him with her thumb, sending him off from the restaurant. As he exits, he's sidetracked by the girls, who convince him to hang out with them for a little while.

Mai's losing the plot a little with adorable giggling at Wakaba, who's telling a story about how Sota once fell in a ditch when he, Wakaba and Shoma went to a Tokyo fairground. Evgenia's laughing softly too, but Yuzuru can tell from her hesitance that Wakaba's talking a little too fast for her understanding.

"Oh, Sota-kun," Yuzuru sighs, causing all three of them to chuckle. "How did you guys enjoy your first World Team Trophy?" Yuzuru turns to Mai and Wakaba, "also, thank you girls for winning the trophy for us.

"A lot," Evgenia answers in beautifully-accented Japanese. Mai and Wakaba nod along in agreement.

"It wasn't just us, it was a team effort, Yuzu-kun." Wakaba answers quickly.

"Oh, come off it, Wakaba-chan! We had a narrow lead before the ladies' free skate, and if you two had bombed, we would've lost the title to Russia," Yuzuru throws a casual glance at Evgenia, who catches it with a smirk, "but no. Wakaba-chan, your performance gave me goosebumps, and luckily for me, Mai-chan, the cameras didn't show me crying at the end of your skate."

Mai looks completely and utterly taken aback.

"You cried at my free skate, Hanyu-sama?"

That's another reason why Yuzuru adores her. She calls him _Hanyu-sama,_ for no apparent reason at all. Yuzuru doesn't think he's anywhere near a religious deity, but he's absolutely honoured she thinks so.

"Call me Yuzu-kun, Mai-chan."

She blushes shyly and Yuzuru tries to laugh, but then it comes out as a yawn, which reminds him that he should take Kana's instructions and start heading back to his room.

"I'm going now," Yuzuru tells them, and all three of them look momentarily disappointed, but nod anyway, "don't stay here for too long, girls, we still have _PPAP_ to rehearse tomorrow morning." All three of them laugh and wave as Yuzuru finally makes his way out of the hall, starting to blunder his way back towards his residence.

 _'Is the world against me sleeping or something?'_ Yuzuru thinks as Brian appears from seemingly out of nowhere, drafting him into a quick-paced English conversation with ease. 

"So Kana asked me to give these to you, one for you and one for Shoma," Brian holds out the most hideous patterned scarves, and he gazes at them in disorientation. _Why_ has he been laden with these ugly things? Not that Yuzuru's not used to wearing questionable outfits, but still. There's questionable, and then there's whatever the fuck these things are. "There for the _PPAP_ routine tomorrow," Brian explains, sensing Yuzuru's confusion, "apparently in that deranged music video, the singer wears something like this.

Ah. That makes sense. It's horrendous, but at least it's not nonsensical.

"Also, you're skating last in the gala tomorrow." Not to sound egotistical, but Yuzuru expected this, "after you've done the actual exhibition routine, you're doing the step sequence from your short. Try and actually look happy while you're doing it," Brian sighs, and Yuzuru remembers his lacklustre energy during the step sequence a couple of days ago.

"I will, coach." Yuzuru is so drained he doesn't even know what he's promising, but he knows he'll sell the program tomorrow to the nosebleed seats. Yuzuru knows he's not perfect, contrary to popular belief, but one thing he does know is that he knows how to sell a program.

"You look exhausted," Brian remarks, "go back to your room, Javi's back by now."

Yuzuru resists the urge to make a sassy comment about how that's where he was heading anyway before he was _rudely interrupted_ , knowing that will get him a reprimanding that will only postpone Yuzuru's opportunity to finally get some rest.

Finally, Yuzuru is free from the strains of being the best figure skater in the world.

Or so he thought.

Yuzuru doesn't know what he was expecting. Whatever it was, it wasn't this.

He opens the door to be met by an icy wind. He starts to speak, to yell at Javi to close the window because he's so tired, but he's jolted away by the silhouettes on the balcony, their shapes outlined in the curtain.

One of them is Javi, he knows that familiar height, body shape and haircut. And this is suddenly _really_ awkward because Javi is kissing someone, none the wiser that Yuzuru is here.

For starters, Yuzuru is confused, because Javi broke up with Miki only a few weeks up ago. Either the person he is kissing is Miki, which would be understandable because Yuzuru knows Javi was hurting because of it, and also the height and proportion in comparison to Javi would fit the description of Miki. But Yuzuru has a suspicion, and he knows he's most likely going to hell for even considering this, but he has a suspicion that _that's not Miki._ Anyway, it doesn't matter that they're kissing out on a balcony, because it's so dark outside and no one actually knows that they're staying in this hotel to be looking, anyway.

Yuzuru decides that it's probably for the best if he just gets ready for bed and pretends he never saw anything.

So he does.

But, that conspiracy theory he had formulated, of the world plotting against him to prevent him from falling asleep, comes back to existence when Yuzuru is snapped to attention by a moan from Javi.

Yuzuru can't believe his ears.

He could've sworn he hears Javi mumble, "you're such a good kisser, _Shoma-chan."_

 _'Fuck privacy,'_ Yuzuru thinks as he tiptoes over to the curtain, praying to any deity that may be listening that he's only hearing things. Taking a deep breath and readying himself, he throws open the curtains.

What the fuck.

_What the fuck._

_What. The. Fuck._

He was right.

Javi and _Shoma_ , kissing on his and Javi's balcony in Tokyo.

Of course it would be like this. Of course the two people Yuzuru's in love with would have to fall in love with each other.

"Um," Yuzuru clears his throat. He knows it's going to be awkward, however he slices it, so he decides it's just best to get it over and done with. Javi and Shoma break apart instantly, both of them flushing scarlet and biting their lips sheepishly.

"Um," Yuzuru says again, too stricken to formulate a proper sentence, "um, what the fuck?"

He can't deny the fact that his heart is breaking. Not just into two, but into four. A quarter broken by Javi, a quarter broken by Shoma, a quarter broken by the fact that it's _those two together,_ and the other quarter because of goddamn fucking fate.

Javi looks at Shoma, and Yuzuru can see him begging the younger to make an excuse.

"Um," Shoma squeaks, "we were trying to formulate a plan to beat you?"

**Author's Note:**

> i actually am going to hell for writing this rip  
> idea came about while i was having a conversation with ella (@4S_3T on twitter)...  
> to all my twitter squad who motivated me to write this  
> hit me up on twitter @OneFlutzAway


End file.
